Mixed Martial B0nes

EliteXC Saturday Night Fights came and went like wildfire on the networks this weekend. Let’s just get this out of the way: EliteXC and CBS have a real winner here. This event was an unquestionable success. Never mind what all the UFC/WEC elitists are saying on the radio and the Interwebs… Kimbo brought his show to Network TV and smashed the living daylights out of the ratings. We are going to see more of EliteXC.

I say, bring it on! Sure, there was crap TV and a bunch of crap fights. But, there was some great and compelling action as well. The hardcore UFC audience is having fits right now but EliteXC and CBS have the last laugh because the hardcore freaks *TUNED IN*!!! Sure they hated it! All three excruciating hours of it and when it comes back (and it WILL) they will hate the next three hours of it too. Honestly, what were you going to watch on Saturday night? Hockey??!!? They’re battling for the Stanley Cup and didn’t get the ratings that this thing did! No, hard core freaks had better hope that with the increased exposure, EliteXC attracts better fighters. So, what the freak (as in SHOW) happened?

Brett “The Grim” Rogers vs. Jon Murphy After waiting for what seemed forever (20 plus minutes of “this is MMA,” (they could have just read MY intro), a little bio and trash talking from both the fighters, then a WWE-esque walk to the cage with rappers and ring girls, plus analysis and whatnot from the announcers) we finally get to see the first fight. Every fight after this would enjoy the same treatment. I actually kind of like the ring girls… wait. Fighting. Oh yeah, it was mostly a pretty tame standup game with a wicked right coming from The Grim to knockout Murphy early in the first round. Jon really wasn’t looking too good and I think the doctors did him a favor even though a lot of UFC purists thought he could continue. Not much to go on here as far as whether these two are any good. We’ll have to see who they get matched up with next.

Joey Villasenor vs. Phil “The New York Badass” Baroni I’m still sorry. Phil’s nickname “New York Badass,” earned him the beatdown that I predicted. It happened a few minutes into the first like the earlier fight. I must admit, it wasn’t *that* much of a beatdown. The ref stopped it as soon as he saw blood gushing from Badass’ nose. The doctors swarmed in on him as well and forced him in his seat even when he wanted to stand up to congratulate VIllasenor. So this is another source of hardcore UFCfanboy criticism. I think that since this is playing on Network TV you can’t have the same standards of bloodiness that you can on basic cable. They’re just protecting their investment folks and it’s going to pay dividends sooner or later.

Gina “Conviction” Carano vs. Kaitlin Young *THIS* was the fight everyone was waiting for. It was definitely the most action packed of the night. Forget about the garbage Kaitlin was talking after the fight: She got owned! Convicted! In two rounds, Gina Carano was in total control and Young didn’t have a single answer for her. If she went another round with Gina, her face would have fallen off from the punches and kicks. This fight was also full of good submission work as well. It doesn’t hurt that Gina is easy on the eyes as well but let’s not downplay what she did: She WORKED Kaitlin Young like she was a pathetic American Gladiator trying to beat her at the pugil stick. Good work girls. Let’s hope we see more ladies in action. They certainly showed that they could fight in *this* match.

Elite XC Middleweight Champion “Ruthless” Robbie Lawler vs. Scott “Hands of Steel” Smith This could have been the best fight of the night. Both Robbie Lawler and Scott Smith were having a great standup battle trading punches and kicks. Just mercilessly attacking each other. However, Lawler had the upper hand most of the three rounds this went. At the end of both the first two rounds, Smith was in a daze and had to grab on to the cage to keep standing. In the end though, a eye poke ended the match. The judges scored it a no contest but I think Lawler would have eventually destroyed Smith if it continued further. He was just too much for Smith. Of course, the real losers were US in the audience: Robbed of a great MMA fight by twitchy doctors and officials.

Kimbo Slice vs. James “The Colossus” Thompson What can we say? Kimbo Kimbo KIMBO! He wanted to take it to the ground to show what Bas Rutten has been teaching him. So that’s exactly what happened. What also happened is that he was exposed for what he is: a poor ground fighter. Even the commentators mentioned that Kimbo didn’t know what he was doing once he got caught underneath the Colossus. The first round was actually the best of them. Both fighters did some damage in the standup and ground games. I’d say Thompson had a very very slight edge on the ground with Kimbo taking the standup like he should. The second round looked as though it should have been Thompson’s. He really nullified Kimbo’s standup and controlled him in ground and pound fashion. Even after the ref stood him and Kimbo up for whatever reason… (fix? That’s what EVERYONE is saying…) James got him back down on the ground and crushed Kimbo’s head repeatedly with big elbow shots. Why didn’t it end in the second? (fix?…) The third saw Slice just destroy the cauliflower ear that the Colossus was sporting. After a few more smashes to James’ temple, the ref decided to give Kimbo the victory we knew he was going to get for this debut on national TV.

Well, love it or hate it. EliteXC is here on CBS. We’ll be seeing more and more of this. Hopefully the fights and the fighters get better and the fixes not so blatant! Oh, did I type that out loud??!!

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WEC 34: Faber vs. Pulver sneaked up on me so fast I didn’t know what hit me. Kind of like the way all of the fighters in this league operate. This was one heck of an action packed event. The main fight between Jens Pulver and Uriah Faber was great in its own right but there were a couple of other fights that deserve some props. Here’s how the last of the Troubles (they come in threes, remember?) went.

Kenneth Alexander vs. Rob McCullough This was one of the slowest moving fights. They mostly did the stick and move, stick and move deal. Good for boxing but not so good for MMA. We want action and blood. If these guys expect to get bigger paychecks, they’d better review the tape and study how *not* to fight in the WEC. Oh yeah, Razer Rob won the match on a split decision. Next time don’t leave it to the judges Alexander.

Chuck Grigsby Vs. Mark Munoz Now we’re talking. These guys went straight to grappling and grinding after a bit of the stick and move. The difference here though was the action. Munoz just dominated his much more experienced opponent. At nearly the end of the 1st, Munoz rained punch after punch and that was that. Mark wins out over Grigsby.

Donald Cerrone Vs. Danny Castillo This match was decided pretty quickly. That being said, the match still was plenty good. The action moved from the stand up to ground and pound. Of course, Castillo didn’t appreciate the action as he was submitted by armlock early in the first. Sorry Danny, maybe you don’t offer up your arm for your opponent next time. Or, if you work it out right, you can get an XBox360 like one of the Ultimate Fighter 7’s losers did!

Yoshiro Maeda Vs. Miguel Angel Torres This was easily the best match of the night. I know that Pulver and Faber was the headliner but these two really laid it out on the line. Their match was pretty cleanly fought i.e. not so many shots to the gonads as in a LOT of these fights! They moved from solid standup action complete with plenty of kicking to the head and sharp, sharp jabs square in each of their noses. When they got tired of beating the hell out of each other, it was ground game time. At one point they were both locking in a foot/leg bar? Since I’m still a newbie I don’t know the move’s name. Nevertheless, it looked like it hurt! The match was like a Rocky movie because both fighters were giving each other the business, talking and gesturing to each other. Finally, Torres popped Maeda in the face a few times… like ten! The ref saw that Yoshiro had had enough and stopped it. Torres retained the belt and Maeda showed a heckofa lot of heart. The rematch should be already in the works unless the WEC is as stupid as the UFC with the way they schedule fights. Let’s hope we see these two in action again.

Uriah Faber Vs. Jens Pulver This headlining match of the night turned out to be the longest drawn out fight as well. Luckily, it was Little Evil and California kid for 25 minutes instead of some shlubs that couldn’t fight their way out of a paper bag… that’s to *you* Kalib Starns! Still, this is the case where the two fighters showed almost too much respect for each other. They were about as evenly matched as you can get and if not for a few mistakes on Pulver, it would have finished with Lil Evil on top. They did a lot of standup sticking and moving but not much in the way of brawling. You have to respect the punching and elbowing power of Uriah though. Standing up right next to him is a recipe for disaster. Of course, getting in his guard or letting him ground and pound you isn’t much of a better alternative. That Jens could make it through all 25 minutes of this fight shows that he is for real win or lose. I worry for Jens’ next opponent. He won’t give Little Evil nearly the amount of fight that Uriah Faber did. With this win, Uriah needs to find an even bigger fish to fight. He may not find it at this weight class. What would happen to him at 155? He could try his luck in the crowded division in the UFC. I think the fighters there had better prepare for the California Kid. He looks ready to jump out of the little pond and into the huge ocean that is the lightweight division in the UFC.