Mixed Martial B0nes

That might leave a little mark…  Miguel Torres isn’t looking like himself these days and may never again!  I guess it’s kind of a “red badge of courage” thing for fighters to get nasty cuts.  Guys with pretty faces just don’t make it in the pro ranks.  I guess that’s why I never got to the big show…  Anyway, WEC 47 delivered it’s usual high quality fights from the little guys.  I think Torres will bounce back but he needs to get a grip on whatever is making him lose.  I think the rest of the competition has figured him out.  Jens needs to go ahead and retire from fighting already.  He is an AWESOME coach and I think his stable of fighters will dominate for years to come.  His stint on the Ultimate Fighter proved as much.  Still, if Little Evil gets it together and puts some more wins on his record at WEC, it wouldn’t be unwelcome.  Go Jens GO!  Here are your results:

No Wanna SeeYa, Not Even For Free Card

* Featherweight bout:  Chad Mendes vs.  Erik Koch
Mendes fooled the judges and beat up Koch via unanimous decision (30-27, 30-27, 30-27).

* Featherweight bout:  Leonard Garcia vs.  George Roop
Garcia and Roop flailed around but couldn’t get a win. The judges made it a draw by scoring it 29-27 (Garcia) 29-27 (Roop) and 28-28. A   point was taken away from Roop for a clean shot to the gonads of Garcia.  OUCH!

* Featherweight bout:  Fredson Paixao vs.  Courtney Buck
Paixao choked the fight out of Buck via submission (rear-naked choke) at 2:39 of round 1.

* Lightweight bout:  Ricardo Lamas vs. France Bendy Casimir
Lamas layed the smack down on Casimir via KO (knee) at 3:43 of round 1.

Main Free As In Natty ICE Beer Card

* Bantamweight Championship bout:  Brian Bowles vs.  Dominick Cruz
Cruz rained the pain on Bowles via TKO (injury) at 5:00 of round 2 to become the new WEC Bantamweight Champion.

* Bantamweight bout:  Miguel Torres vs.  Joseph Benavidez
Benavidez choked the fight out of Torres via submission (guillotine choke) at 2:57 of round 2.

* Featherweight bout:  Jens Pulver vs.  Javier Vazquez
Vazquez choked the fight out of Pulver via submission (armbar) at 3:41 of round 1.

* Featherweight bout:  Deividas Taurosevičius vs.  LC Davis
Davis fooled the judges and beat up Taurosevičius via majority decision (29-28, 29-28, 29-29).

* Lightweight bout:  Bart Palaszewski vs. Armenia Karen Darabedyan
Palaszewski choked the fight out of Darabedyan via submission (armbar) at 4:40 of round 1.

* Bantamweight bout:  Scott Jorgensen vs.  Chad George
Jorgensen choked the fight out of George via submission (guillotine choke) at 0:31 of round 1.

* Lightweight bout:  Danny Castillo vs.  Anthony Pettis
Pettis layed the smack down on Castillo via KO (strikes) at 2:17 of round 1.

The Ultimate Fighter Heavyweights Finale rumbled in on December 5th, 2009 with a whimper and left with a big HONK! er Country. Yes, horror of all horrors, Roy “Big Country” Nelson emerged victorious and is now the newest Ultimate Fighter winner. I keep forgetting and, I think, everyone else keeps forgetting that this is a *GAME SHOW*. So Brendan Shaub getting nailed in the temple shouldn’t have been a surprise. He just doesn’t have the ring experience that Nelson has. At least he didn’t get his face smashed by Roy’s belly like all the other losers on TUF that got schooled by him. “Meathead” Mitrone took down “Big Baby.” I was really pulling for Marcus to redeem himself but he showed his inexperience as well. He’s got a few years to get better though. Kimbo won his first match as a UFC fighter. This shouldn’t have been such a snoozer. You can thank Houston Alexander’s camp for sticking to the most boring gameplan ever: Circle, circle, circle, smack Kimbo in the knee, circle, circle, circle, smack Kimbo on the knee, Oops! get owned by Kimbo Slice’s *ground game*??!?! The headliner fight between Matt Hamill and Jon Jones was easily the most exciting if you remove the win by DQ for Hamill. I’ve won by DQ before. You really feel like a bitch raising your hand in victory while you are bleeding your nose out. Hamill is better than that but Jones is something else. Watch out UFC, Jones is not going away!

Here’s your results in all their inglorious crappitude…

No Wanna See You Undercard Fights:

* Welterweight bout:  John Howard vs.  Dennis Hallman
Howard put the hurt on Hallman via KO (Strikes) at 4:55 of round 3.

* Light Heavyweight bout:  Brian Stann vs.  Rodney Wallace
Stann fooled the judges and beat up Wallace via unanimous decision. (30-27, 29-28, 29-28)

* Heavyweight bout:  Jon Madsen vs.  Justin Wren
Madsen fooled the judges and beat up Wren via split decision. (30-27, 28-29, 29-28)

Main Drunk on the Couch or Pub Spike TV Fights:

* Heavyweight bout:  Marcus Jones vs.  Matt Mitrione
Mitrione put the hurt on Jones via KO (Punches) at 0:10 of Round 2.

* Lightweight bout:  Frank Edgar vs.  Matt Veach
Edgar choked the fight out of Veach via Submission (Rear Naked Choke) at 2:22 of Round 2.

* Lightweight bout:  Mark Bocek vs.  Joe Brammer
Bocek choked the fight out of Brammer via submission (rear-naked choke) at 3:36 of round one.

* Catchweight (212 lb) bout:  Kimbo Slice vs.  Houston Alexander
Slice fooled the judges and beat up Alexander via unanimous decision. (29-28, 29-28, 30-27)

* Light Heavyweight bout:  Matt Hamill vs.  Jon Jones
Hamill dropped his hands and used his unguarded face to win against Jones via DQ (illegal elbow) at 4:14 of Round 1

* Heavyweight bout:  Darrill Schoonover vs.  James McSweeney
McSweeney put the hurt on Schoonover via TKO (Strikes) at 3:20 of Round 3.

* Heavyweight bout:  Roy Nelson vs.  Brendan Schaub
Nelson put the hurt on Schaub via KO (Punch) at 3:25 of Round 1 to become the The Ultimate Fighter 10 Heavyweights Winner.

UFC 106: Someone vs. Someone else came and went on Saturday Novemeber 21, 2009.  Everything was shuffled around.  Some guys who weren’t headlining became stars.  Others who were stars became chumps.  Still another fighter wound up winning without even fighting!  Must have taken Enter the Dragon to heart and learned the Art of Fighting Without Fighting.  At least we still get our Freebies and they were some great matches.

Forgot how much I missed Ben Saunders crazy smiles.  Well, Griffin got his “revenge.”  Guess that will teach him not to have Jr. Seau in his corner this time.  Sorry Junior, I bled Charger Blue with you for 10 years but you are no MMA cut man no matter what your new show says.  Junior was there when Anderson Silva took apart Griffin quite handily.  Maybe their rematch will go better.  Here are your results:

No Wanna See You Undercard Fight:

* Lightweight bout:  Caol Uno vs.  Fabricio Camoes
Uno and Camoes fumbled around to a draw after three rounds. The judges scored the fight 29-27 (Uno), 28-28 and 28-28. Camoes got a point taken off for a few love taps to the head of Uno… with his FOOT.

Spike TV Too Cheap For PPV Fights:

* Welterweight bout:  Ben Saunders vs.  Marcus Davis
Saunders put the hurt on Davis via KO (knees) at 3:24 of round 1. This bout aired on the PPV broadcast following the Cane vs. Nogueira bout.

* Welterweight bout:  Brock Larson vs.  Brian Foster
Foster put the hurt on Larson via TKO (strikes) at 3:25 of round 2.

* Lightweight bout:  George Sotiropoulos vs.  Jason Dent
Sotiropoulos choked the fight out of Dent via submission (armbar) at 4:36 of round 2.

Main PPV and/or Drunk at the Pub Fights:

* Welterweight bout:  Amir Sadollah vs.  Phil Baroni
Sadollah fooled the judges and beat up Baroni via unanimous decision (30-27, 30-27, 29-28).

* Light Heavyweight bout:  Luiz Cane vs.  Antonio Rogerio Nogueira
Nogueira put the hurt on Cane via TKO (punches) 1:58 in round 1.

* Welterweight bout:  Paulo Thiago vs.  Jacob Volkmann
Thiago fooled the judges and beat up Volkmann via unanimous decision (29-28, 30-27, 30-27).

* Middleweight bout:  Kendall Grove vs.  Jake Rosholt
Grove choked the fight out of Rosholt via submission (triangle choke) at 3:59 of round 1.

* Welterweight bout:  Josh Koscheck vs.  Anthony Johnson
Koscheck choked the fight out of Johnson via submission (rear naked choke) 4:47 in round 2.

* Light Heavyweight bout:  Tito Ortiz vs.  Forrest Griffin
Griffin fooled the judges and beat up Ortiz via split decision (28-29, 30-27, 29-28).